Uncle Arthur (part two)

Although my recent Uncle Arthur post (click here if you missed it) didn't elicit quite this response,

Lady from Zululand:

 "I can honestly say that it was through them (Bedtime Stories) that I got a desire for the better things in life...

(new car? swimming pool? French perfume? five star holidays? NOPE! Read on...)

I am now married to a Methodist minister."

(!)

many of you did ask me to post more of his groovy pics and hilarious captions, (which Curtise describes perfectly as "retro commedy gold") so this post is for you...

from "How Mother Learned to Drive"

(lets just say it involved divine intervention...)

"Nine year-old Dora didn't like it a bit. All her friends had mothers who could drive. Why couldn't her mother? What a good time they could have if only Mother could drive!"

Dora sounds like a pain in the patootie!

from "Bottom of the Class"



This is the story of Jerry, a "fixture at the bottom of his class". Until one exciting, wonderful day when he "moves one up from bottom". There's cake and ice cream all round, until Mum pops into school to thank Jerry's teacher. 

"I'm so glad he isn't bottom any more," she said.

"So am I," said Teacher.

"I wonder who is bottom now?" said Mother.

"He's a little boy from Pakistan," said teacher; "he doesn't speak any English".

A strange look came over Mother's face.

Safe to say, I think Jerry's ice cream days were numbered.

This stuff really is "retro commedy gold!" Uncle Artie would not get away with stories like this these days. That's for sure.

from "Carrying the Pennant"

(included because I like "Bridget's" candlewick bedspread, lamp, curtain, etc)

from "Mysterious Stranger"

(and yet they look strangely happy to see him. What about 'Stranger Danger'?)

from "Jimmy, Timmy and the Snowballs"

"I'm sorry," said Jimmy.

"That's all right," said the man. "just don't do it again."

"I won't," said Jimmy. And he didn't.

Mother saw to that.

I bet she did!

from "Slow Coach Sandy"

 Sandy can run like the wind when he wants to, but "as for church, well, perhaps I shouldn't mention it." Ha-ha!

One of the reasons Uncle Arthur wrote Bedtime Stories was to "make bad children good and good children better" In the forward of one of his Volumes he writes "children loved them because, well, they just loved them" Right!? He also writes "and so there was a great clamour for more and yet more" Clamour? Nice word, but seriously?

If you clamour for more Uncle Arthur let me know. I aim to please.

Now I'm wondering if the great man himself had anything to do with this tea towel I picked up the other day? Not vintage, but too good to leave behind

and currently winging sailing its way across the sea to someone who I think, will appreciate its irony...

x